HaSieS CrimaXious's bLoOog

2009-02-23T06:57:00.000-08:00

Beautiful...
That's the word that came to his mind when gazing over the vast garden in his own eyes. Such peerless and flawless beauty of nature had attracted this young boy,dressed in white silk shirt and black trousers. His youthful face reflects his vigor, full of energy. He ran across the garden, deeply drawn to the seemingly endless perpetual paradise. Still unable to contain his own wonder of the beautiful garden, the child then sang.
''I see trees of green........ red roses too,
I see em bloom........ for me and you,
And I think to myself..... what a wonderful world....''
He then carved a pleasing smile on his lips, continued to admire the garden's beauty. Beauty that reminded him of freedom, hope and peace in this world.
A glance into the garden can seemingly take away all problems of the world. He thought to himself.

Out of sudden, there was a loud shrieking sound came from behind. As he turned to see, his green eyes swelled as he was shocked to see an explosion which was just yards away. The young child was filled with fear to the point that he could not move. It was too late for him to escape from the blast...
The young boy had no idea...

2009-02-20T20:19:00.001-08:00

''Carrying with all of our hopes and dream''

In a nutshell, nearly all of us have our own hopes, aspirations and dreams. (duh!) Well, maybe some of us have it and pursue them while some just sit at the corner and only dream about them. We also aspire to be the person that we want to be, thinking that our life will be perfect and will be our zenith and peak of our recorded life history. Perhaps, that would be the only solution endless search of complete and total victory, a sort of utopia-like or paradise-like, realizing that we have achieved the purpose of our life and can finally declare that we have led a successful life. Can we achieve them? Are we able to see our accomplished lifelong dreams right in front of our own very eyes? We want to be successful. Yes. The question lies in not how we able to achieve them, but rather, what do they mean to you? The sky have its limits...

2009-01-07T05:43:00.000-08:00

Double tagged by Chaco and Andrew Tan

A. Attached or single?

Attached...

B. Best friend?
Don't really have last time but now I have her...

C. Cake or pie?
Both...

D. Day of choice?

Friday

E. Essential item?
Now I know specs is important...

F. Favorite color?
Crimson Red

G. Gummy bears or worms?

Gummy Bears

H. Hometown?

Sandakan and now Petaling Jaya as my current hometown...

I. Favorite indulgence?

Magnum Almond, Snickers, Mars Bars, Haagen Daaz, chendol, ais kacang, teh ais

J. January or July?

Doesn't matter...

K. Kids?

When the time comes after marriage...

L. Life isn't complete without?

Grace...

M. Marriage date?
Not too soon, when I have her permission....

N. Number of magazine subscriptions?
1 or 2, that was last time though

O. Oranges or apples?

Apples

P. Phobias?

maybe time...lol

Q. Quotes?

'' You can never fail a man for trying.''

R. Reasons to smile?

Her, God, friends, books, ice cream

S. Season of choice?
Spring

T. Tag 10 people.
Xiying, Daniel Sim, Mun Yee, Roy, Mr Kenny, Michelle Goh, Paul Wong, Sherene, Vincent Lee, Jason Lee

U. Unknown fact about me?

What's not obvious about me...

V. Vegetable?

Spinach, I'm not popeye though...

W. Worst habit?

Sleep late, like to push my nose upwards...

Y. Your favorite food?
Burger, Pizza, Spaghetti, Cheese baked rice

Z. Zodiac sign?
Aries

2008-12-14T23:36:00.000-08:00

It's been a long time since the last time I had blogged. Sorry for a long hiatus. Real long hiatus.
Anyway, Christmas is coming soon and I love Christmas!!! It is the best season for the year in my opinion. Christmas celebrations never cease to amuse me. Every year, I cherish every moment of Christmas celebrations whether it's from tv, radio, computer or others, it's just different when you celebrate Christmas.

I would like to dedicate the rest of this post to my love, Xiying. Never would I expect that both of us will get into relationship, I mean this far. Therefore, I'm really extremely both grateful as well as surprised when she accepted me. Thank God for making this happened and this proved to be a miracle for me!! After months of struggling with the feelings I had towards her, it's been quite a journey. It's been an adventure of a lifetime in which I began to feel the darkest, deepest and lowest level of my life as I'm in a long battle of attrition in pursuing and winning her heart. Tears and toils taking their toll me even as I'm in this situation, the first time of my life. I began to question my own wisdom and sincerity in choosing to continue to pursue her even though it seemed to be a fruitless endeavor. Question after question continue to haunt my own mind, debating the necessity of the choice I made.

However, bigger part of this adventure does not necessarily limit itself in pursuing and winning her heart and her affections. It includes my own search, rediscovering and even preserving the identity that I can only find in God. Most of the time, the core of the challenge is whether I do have what it takes to do it. But even before you can answer this core question, another preceding code that needed to be deciphered and had to be fully applied is ''who you are''- who do you believe you are, where does your desire takes you, to whom you can fully lean on for your desire and finally, what can you do about it. The code itself is simple yet complicated as it unfolds to several complicated questions that requires more than books or experiences that can fully prepare yourself to be able to answer all of them. Learning to surrender to God and learning to let God take care can be very different things together.

I must admit that only God alone can make it happen through His works and sown seeds in my endeavor. He really uses her to change a lot of things in my life and especially, my own character. Character after all, the core essence of one's heart and soul, causal-effect of one's actions, color of ones life. A beautiful character captivates, a strong character makes odds capitulate, a stunning character captures, a wise character considers and a caring character concerns. Sounds easy but it takes journey of lifetime to cultivate such character and only the Creator with His creativity can know ''what,who,what,when and how to'' technicalities to paint such character. Vulnerabilities after all builds resilience. You don't lie when you want to deny such thing happening in front of you and you don't bluff when you justifying yourself. I made a lot of mistakes and errors in that track. I even struggles with grace and mercy and salvation. But God is my whispering hope.

I thank God for having that privilege and knowing her and I believed in His timing, when it comes, it comes. It is a blessing to be not only her friend but to be her lover as well. Thank God for making our love alive and living. He is the lifeline that fuels our romance. He is the living essence that takes presence in us. Thank God for making a ''stoner'' to be a ''stunner'', a dumb to be dandy( not about appearance, LOL). The captured moment that characterizes my life and the new chapter that will be part of my charter.

Oh, by the way, I don't normally do well at writing poetries and song, God uses her to awake my desire and delight in beauty of everything.

So, friends,readers, travelers, strangers alike, I write this in a simplest (maybe not) and sincerest (definitely) I can as my heart poured on. No worries, it's not an emo post but a exhilarating one.

What a wonderful world!!

2008-11-02T09:06:00.000-08:00

2008-10-26T04:00:00.000-07:00

Discover your heart

Staring the ceiling with the empty heart
Life is not what you've known to be
Carrying it with bruises and scars of life
It's tempting to die and leave it all, ''all''

One only knows death, for death seemingly solves all
Yet the problems still remained, remnants of unresolved heart
Shattered heart, scattered soul, struggling to stand up
Yet there are choices, a call for your own ''cause''

Stand up at your feet and be the champion of your heart
Lift up the curtains of your heart
Look over the windows of your soul
Move out from your comfort home

Journey to the unknown, venture to the untouched
Dangerous as it may seemed, adventures celebrate it all
Knowing who you are as you step outside
Life that is unseen by all, lives in you

Experience the comfort of your challenges,
Changing the core of your soul
Experience the process of perilous life,
Your destination maybe a distance, but your destiny is discovered

2008-09-30T08:56:00.000-07:00

He will never give you up

He means you.
Yes, you.

Even Obama can't convince you of this.

You can be sure of that.

The whole world tells you that.

He's definitely won't let you down.

He wants you to know that he mean it... deeply...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yu_moia-oVI

He wants you to hear his song.

Yes, I'm joking.

Last but not least.

A post dedicated to Ricky, my friend.

2008-09-21T22:16:00.000-07:00

~Continue~
Larien, the First Princess
The Toymaker's first doll, Larien , the new ruler of the toys, was responsible and obedient in carrying out her master's plan in developing and expanding the land aside from building more cities and more cities.
Though she was a doll, her outer appearance could be said to be so beautiful that humans would think that she's a human just like them. Her long golden hair shone like sunlight, bringing radiance and light to those who look at her. Her light purple eyes were attractive, surpassing the human standards and her rose colored lips that can put other roses in shame. The Toymaker had, indeed, created his finest and magnificent toy compared to his previous creations. He had given her beauty that other toys could only admire.
Aside from her beauty, Larien was given the power of creation, no other toys have the power to create their kind except her. Once, when Larien sang, other toys that listened would be transformed to be more beautiful and more delicate. Not only that, a gentle breeze, bringing the flowers in the air as she sang.
Even the Toymaker could not believe of what he had seen in her. He did not know that what he created was far beautiful than what he had envisioned.
Hence, Larien truly lived up to her name as Larien means dawn. She would be the dawn, bringing the sunshine to her realm. Indeed, the old Toymaker was very pleased and delighted and planned to create more dolls so that Larien would not feel lonely. He wanted Larien to have sisters that will work together with Larien and continue to carry out his dreams and aspirations.

2008-08-29T04:47:00.000-07:00

sry guys...havent update for so long...due to laziness...hahaha...
anyway..now i'm in my new semester right now but all of my classes now are in early morning..which is quite sad because i'm not a morning person..and i can look like a drunkard especially during early morning...couldnt concentrate and think...want to talk also talk in a foreign language...that shows how worse i am especially when i'm very sleepy...my exam results will be released next week...but i'm not really concerned ( not that i'm very smart la) just that i have no time to worry over them... i can only say..God bless...

Congratulations to UTAS debate team, Bak, Jason and Chaco and also Michael, Bethany and Lydia (you guys did greatly as well) Proud of you guys...

2008-08-23T08:13:00.000-07:00

You have the face of an ugly person and you had live with that face all this while. One day, you know that there is a chance for you to be beautiful and get away from your ugly place. However, in order for you to be beautiful, you need to sacrifice your friendship with your closest friends.

Would you readily give up and sacrifice your friendship in exchange for having a beautiful face that you have been desiring all this while?

2008-08-06T20:43:00.000-07:00

''Tears are beautiful,
they wash away the dry lands,
a heart's cry echoes the one's desire to celebrate life,
I hide my heart under the great celebration of life,
having been delivered from long drought of uncertainty.

The skies of joy are really beyond imagination..
Where tales of heroism and romance found their match made in heaven,
the reason I live is that my existence is not a mistake and a gift to the world.
My birth to the world is my destiny.
God told me that He loves me and my birth is His gift to the world.
Love is what He lavishes on me.''

2008-08-01T07:01:00.000-07:00

As tagged by BAK and requested, I shall answer these questions. This is my update before my finals next week.

Instructions: Remove 1 question from below, and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged.

1. At what age do you wish to marry?
Well...For me, ideally, I prefer at the age of 30 if I happen to find the right one that destined to be with me. Otherwise, keep on waiting. Lol..As if 30 is my deadline. Well, going into marriage at a earlier age is not necessarily a good thing. The problem is not about commitment sometimes, it's about compatibility and mutual recognition that needed to be stronger before entering and building a solid marriage.

2. What is your most favourite thing to do?
Yum-cha/mamak sessions. Chatting while staring at the dark sky wondering when the young night will be old. Oh it's morning now.

3. If you have a close close close friend since childhood who loves to take away whatever you like, including guys/girls, and he/she always wins, will you still consider him/her your friend?
Well, depends, I won't give them away but I will definitely share with them(limited to guys or girls because they are not take-away properties) if I am interested in sharing of course. Seriously, what kind of friend that can take your things away including guys or girls, he or she might as well be your husband or wife. =D

4. What would you give up in return to eat all you want in the world and not get fat ?
Nah, I won't give anything up for that because I know that no matter what, I won't be fat by eating. Lol.

5. If you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be?
I want to be a king!!! But anyway, I want to establish a happy family with beautiful kids, my crown princes and princesses, but before that I need a queen. We all stayed in a palace(prefer to be smaller but spacious) Well, it's a dream.

6. Do you believe you can survive without money?
Without money, it is very very hard to continue to survive. However, as long as you can satisfy your basic requirements like food, shelter, clothing aside from breathing oxygen into your lungs, then there's a possibility you can survive with great deal of hardship.

7. What are you afraid to lose the most?
I admitted that I used to think that I am a person that has nothing to lose due to my pride. Over the years, I regretted at the things that I have lost. Sometimes, bitterly but I refuse to admit them. But now, I concluded that I am afraid to lose family and friends, thanks to God to help me to see through that.

8. What do you feel like doing, right now?
Drinking wine/teh ais/ribenna/hot chocolate/smoothies or eating ice cream/pudding/jelly.

9. If there's someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
Hahahahaha..... What a question.. If you don't tell, she won't know. A girl once told me that truth is all that matters. However I personally believe that confession will come spontaneously once you are certain and know that you really love him or her. Time decides.

10. List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.
Lol...Since it's about good points, I should be saying something good.
She's smart.
She's sarcastic.
She's ''happening''.

11. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
For a undeserving jerk like me, I actually dare to ask for very higher standard requirement from my other half. Lol, don't think I can list all of them.
Usual qualities like committed and lover of God, honest and straight-forward, sarcastic/ witty, innocent, considerate, caring. Sorry if these requirements can be too unrealistic and contradictory.

12. What is the thing that will make you think he/she is bad?
One that betrays and backstabs/frontstabs me.

13. What is your ambition?
Doing something that God delights and pleases. That's my offering to Him.
Anyway, I hope to be a good father, husband, son, employer/employee, student, customer, lol... I want to be a warrior for God. =)

14. Is anyone really perfect?
Well depends. It seemed that there are a lot of school of thoughts. Generally, people are not perfect in anyway. However, I sincerely believe perfection of people is more of having well-balanced and developed personalities/gifts specifically made for people with different and distinct tastes. One can't be perfectionist, can they?

15. If you had a choice to be rich or happy, which one would you pick ?
Lol.. Of course, being happy.
Applying creativity you can be both rich and happy, rich in happiness.

16. If you have a chance, which part of your character you would like to change?
The inability to open up to people and my anti social behavior. I got trust issues with people, sorry to say that. Give me time and space and hopefully, I have a likeable personality.

17. Who is the person that you can share all your problems with?
God, mostly and my inner circle. Sorry to say, I can be a secretive person and I actually cared enough to categorize all of my secrets in different levels. I usually limit a lot of sharing bout myself to others. Something that I want to change sincerely.

18. How do you see yourself in 10 years time?
This sounds like one of those MLM/Pyramid scheme question asked to anyone who want to be rich as fast as possible. Anyway, 10 years from now, I will see myself settling in
career, hopefully, family or hopefully still building and developing my life towards the peak and zenith of my life.

19. What is the one thing you love about yourself?
I don't know. You tell me.
But, I am those that love to draw and design weapons of war; it's my ''passion''. hahaha..I guess that not everyone love that. Be yourself is what you need.

20. If you had 24 hours to do anything, anything at all in the world, whether it be realistically possible, what would it be?
I have so much plans even for 24 hours. I would like to take chances to go back in time to hopefully correcting mistakes that I had made, recording my lost sweet moments of life and getting back my toys that I have lost. Otherwise, I must conquer the world in 24 hours. XD

I lazy to tag people. If you feel prompted to do these questions after reading my blog, then tag me. Lol..
I just want to give choices to people.

2008-07-18T23:06:00.000-07:00

Passion World Tour 2008

Date/ Time : 3 August 2008
Location : Sunway Convention Center
Cost : RM20

PASSION KUALA LUMPUR is a gathering for UNIVERSITY-AGED young people throughout Malaysia and South-east Asia. Believing in the university moment, and what God longs to do in this strategic window of time, the entire event will focus on the bigness of God, calling students to PRAYER, WORSHIP and ACTION, and a Story so much bigger than their own.
The heartbeat of PASSION KUALA LUMPUR is to:
- ENCOURAGE the CHURCH
- Foster UNITY among those who love JESUS
- Spark VISION for the UNIVERSITIES of Kuala Lumpur and the nation
- Tell the STORY of REDEMPTION in compelling ways
- INSPIRE students to EMBRACE their part in God’s global plan for the NATIONS

Why the World
Finding in Christ all we need, and spending our lives to make Him famous in this generation… that’s what The Passion Movement is all about and what has attracted hundreds of thousands of university aged young people to Passion gatherings over the past eleven years.
Passion is more than an event. Passion is a movement made up of young people who have abandoned the idea of living simply for themselves and are daily giving everything so the world can see Jesus more clearly. Passion is about the glory of God, inspiring a wave of students to taste and see that He is good and to do something now to change the world in Jesus’ name.
We’ve discovered that every major city in the world is a university town, most home to hundreds of thousands, and in some cases millions of students. So, Passion is off on a crazy journey to the cities of the world in 2008, uniting university students around the globe in a story so much bigger than our own.

“Yes Lord, walking in the way of Your truth we wait eagerly for You, for Your name and renown are the desire of our souls.” Isaiah 26:8

From the beginning Passion has been rooted in the confession of Isaiah 26:8: "Yes Lord, walking in the way of Your truth we wait eagerly for You, for Your name and renown are the desire of our souls.''
As a result, Passion seeks to gather college and university students across the nation and around the world to seek the face of God, asking Him to ignite in our souls a passionate pursuit of Jesus Christ and a desire to spread His fame to everyone on earth.

Let His passion for us become our passion for Him. Stay blessed. See you. =)

2008-07-11T19:33:00.000-07:00

Creation of Larien, the First Princess
After days of pondering, the Toy Maker finally realized what was missing.
''At last, I know what was missing. The children (toys) needs rulers to protect them and take care of their welfare. I'm unable to care for all of my children.''

The Toy Maker set off to make the ruler of the toys and in 4 days, the first doll in the realm was created.

He gave her name ''Larien'' and she would be given the privilege to guard the toys and protect them.

Unlike other toys, Larien had been given the power of creation by the Toy Maker. She will be his representative in ruling the toys.

Although Larien was created a doll, her body was created in the exact size of a human.
Larien shares the emotion and personality of a human, something that the toys lacking of, they were created to have limitations in their emotion and personalities.

The Toy Maker spent a lot of time and effort in crafting Larien, she will be like his daughter. He hoped and expected great things from Larien, she would be sharing his desire to create toys.

2008-07-11T08:14:00.000-07:00

Toy Maker's Legend
Once upon a time, there was an old man who loved to make toys..
Making toys was his passion, his life..
And he created all kinds of toys, from the obedient toy soldiers to mighty teddy bears..
They were not just ordinary toys, these toys were living toys...
Life granted to them by the gentle and powerful touch of the Toy Maker , an old man with a desire to make toys for fun...
His pleasure in creating toys led to creation of better and stronger toys. As the days passed, more and more toys continue to populate the realm. All the toys were organized by the Toy Maker to build a grand and magnificent city to house all of these toys.
Millions of toys from different designs and sizes that the Toy Maker constructed began building this city. Less than a week, the whole city was finished by the toys.
The Toy Maker was happy that finally, the city was finished but he was still not satisfied. He pondered on something that he might had left out. He wonder what it was.

2008-06-13T10:10:00.000-07:00

Of striving and strife

Strive, strive...
We strive a lot in our daily lives.
Maybe, too much.
Yea, surely all the efforts, works and energy will bring their rewards in the end.
Right?
Unfortunately, all this striving and exertion of becoming perfection will prove disappointment in the end of the day.
Why?
Not everything can be built purely based on the efforts they put in. Well, I'm not suggesting we should not put our hard work into something, but the degree of our effort and our way of channeling energy are the things matter.
We fight too much, we work too much, we strike too much. Only fail to rest, the failure to do so is already a failing factor in our pursuit of goals. Talking about our goals, not all goals can be fulfilled
at one time; some may never live to see their goals fulfilled.
I once was infected with this disease of striving. Striving to be the best, to be perfect, to please people, to be the most popular and ultimately to be the ultimate striver. I am obsessed with perfection of myself and surrounding, anxious to see the results that I expect to get from my strivings. Unfortunately, this disease had left me ever anxious, worry and competitive in this age of strife. An endless fightings and never-ending pursuit, both prove to be taking its toll on me until I finally decided to destroy everything that I sought to create. Fortunately, God has healed and transformed me to abandon these strivings because I can trust everything in His hands and His spirit inspires me to learn the proper management of energy. =) Ultimately, it is Him that will give things to people who deserve them and the heart for them. This does not mean that we should not work hard and God has His own way of blessing the deserved ones. We should learn to work hard but effectively; cost effective! (lol)
I am really regret of my strive to be the best of everything and it costs me a lot and I sacrifice a lot of things to strive. God's true love cheers me up and help me to know that once we know the truth, it will set us free despite the pains we have.

2008-06-11T09:32:00.000-07:00

Random thoughts

" The sky is high but you can touch them...."

2008-06-09T09:59:00.000-07:00

Random thoughts

~''The fact I like you does not change the fact I love you''~

2008-05-23T23:54:00.000-07:00

Random Memorable Moments

It was the night before she went to Australia.
After her farewell dinner, I walked her back to car...
( Because I need her transport to get home!)

In the car park, strong wind was blowing and blowing,
Rather gently, not even a gust...
I said to her, '' Don't worry, the strong wind here will cheer you up and you will be fine.''
Instead of feeling touched by my words of encouragement, she was like (SWT..... or 0_o)
But eventually at the end of the night, hmm, i mean journey to my home, she thanked me.

Just realized that I had forgotten that I had been missing her after she left. ( As a friend)
But then, never know farewell can have teary weary moments. ( Nope, I didn't cry)

2008-05-21T08:06:00.000-07:00

Life goes on

All this while, he had been traveling on that road,
The road of carnage and destruction
Vengeance and revenge were his life
That became his vendetta of his life
The cold had cause his heart to be frozen.
Yet, the flames in heart were burning at the same time

He was feared by his enemies, having slain many
His shadow alone casts fear to the hearts of his enemies
This gave him the confidence and strength
The shadow was his home, his mind guard and keeper
The shadow reminded him of his troubled past
That seemed to be tainting his once bright life forever

He should had been satisfied, knowing that he had his revenge
His actions proved him wrong, knowing that he achieved nothing
Misery and disillusionment clouded his mind
The storm of his soul rages at his inability
His conscience rebel at his failure
Yet, he continue to mask his feelings over these and proceeded

During his tough, dark struggle with his own self
The wounded knight met a young maiden
Together, they fell in love, it tasted sweet
Not for long, the knight's past haunted him
This caused him to be cold to his beloved
It broke her heart into pieces and she cried

Further disappointed, the knight planned to end
His life, once and for all, he lost everything
He drew his sword and prepared to finish what he was
An elderly man quickly rushed and stopped his action
'' Do not die early, young man, life is so precious.''
Tears rolled down his cheeks, the knight was touched

No longer disheartened, the knight's heart was crying
''Young man, all this while you are a knight, serving none.''
The knight admitted that he was just a self-proclaimed knight
He wanted to be a knight but no one's take him in
''I am the king of the realm and I want you to be my knight.''
The ''knight'' could not believe his ears for a king chooses him

''In the past, you don't have a master, but now you have me.''
The knight swore his allegiance to the king,vow to serve him
''Your past is over now, my young knight and I will train you.''
For now, the knight discarded the old mask that he despised
''I grant you the use of my personal sword and it's all yours''
Given privilege to serve the Crown and honor to use His Majesty's sword
The knight raised his new sword high, taking his new duty dutifully
It shall be a new beginning of knight's life serving under His Majesty

To think that all sorrows of your life to be end in one moment
It's a foolish idea and that what the knight thought
What he did not know, no matter how small hope is given
A hope is still a hope for it casts away hopelessness
The knight wishes to get rid of the hopelessness
And a hope has changed him and his life.. Life goes on

2008-05-15T12:19:00.000-07:00

Life o Life (LoL)

All day long, I’m staring at outside

Wishing life could have been better

I saw a textbook on my table

It reminded me of essay writing classes

Life is like an essay, a composition

It maybe short… It maybe long….

But who cares, it’s our stories anyway….

And we wish to write our own way

Life’s a narrative essay, a construct

Events after events shaping our very lives

Building our plot over time like a storyboard

Tales after tales, recounting our struggle with lives

Moments after moments, capturing our dramatized expressions

Logic or illogical, that’s our question of the story

Life’s a process essay, a change….

For better or worse…we will never know

Good or bad, Black or white…

How and how kept howling in the heart…

How could this happening in our life

Sequences of events playing in our mind

Life’s more than a cause and effect essay

We wonder why, we wonder how

We wander here, we wander there

What causes trouble, we asked…

What’s with the effect, we wondered….

Woe to the heart, we can’t help it…

Life can be a comparative essay

Discriminatory at its best while we were all the same

We shared the essence of being called humans

But race, religion and background differentiate us

Some are rich, some are poor, we’re not the same

Compare and contrast the realities of our lives

Life isn’t just a straight line, it has ups and downs

Life isn’t just ended with a line, it has full of paragraphs

Life isn’t just writing the essay, we have to plan and organize it

Life isn’t just rushing the essay, we won’t be able to complete it

Life is but a life, living out loud or living on loose, lit it up

Life is just lame since we talked as if we understand it..

Life is about getting a life, a brave account of how we live

2008-04-27T05:49:00.000-07:00

Innocent Days
Vocals: Hitomi
Lyrics: Kuroishi Hitomi
Composition: Kuroishi Hitomi

The spring seethes and the river surges
Please watch over that deep sea
You soar up into the air with mysterious wings
Please guide that dark sky

The dawn rain freely
Moistens my cheeks
Like embracing a child
I’d like it to surround me tenderly

A glance that seems to burn
The power to pursue a beautiful dream
Please put on your heart and soul
And take me along to a sinless era

You soar up into the air with mysterious wings
Please guide that dark sky
Amen

2008-04-26T01:08:00.000-07:00

I'm sure you guys or others always wondered why do I always looked depressed, tired or confused.
Even if I said it's part of my personality, I'm pretty much sure that you guys do not believe me.
Yea, it's ridiculous to claim depression as a part of personality, I know that. But if I said that it's part of expression of my feeling, I am sure you guys will be agreed with me. The thing is if I am nt happy, I am trying my best not to destroy others' mood and ruin the party, u gotta bear with me if u want to bring around..XD

If you still have heart and mood to read my next paragraph, perhaps you are considerate and tolerance about my misunderstood and under-regulated behaviour. If yes, I thank God for your concern and understanding. If no, I thank God that you finally understand I am a psycho.

I'm but a human.

Anyway, a lot of the problems that I am facing are complicated, can't really explain to you guys even the closest ones, because I also don't understand. Lol.. But you see, even if I explain the nature of my problems, you guys won't get it and you guys prolly saying '' Gee...What's with you man, so mentally messed up! '' I can't help it if you guys have this kind of feeling. After all, it's what you perceived and I have no right to brainwash you guys to think in my shoes. Btw, my shoes are yellow-black bumble shoes, owned by none other than me, the sole owner of the known universe. Does that crack u up? It should. If not, you just don't have sense of humor and lameness. You just failed.

That's the introduction for those wishing to know about my inner psyche which at the point still remains to be uncharted and only God knows the geographical areas of my psyche.
God bless and take care.

2008-04-22T10:41:00.000-07:00

Random Questions

Courtesy from Mun Yee's old random post
http://mct421.deviantart.com/art/Question-Meme-Generator-69266481

1. How did you meet Lim Min Tet?

Uhm, well...we're classmates..only gotten closer once we hit Form 5...XD

2. Oh no, Joram got kidnapped by aliens! What do you say once they get back?

''How's Joram doing there at your place?''

3. Describe Brian Chee in five words.

Talented, genius, thoughtful, nice, serious.

4. Would you love to read Likee's very personal diary?

Personally, I would not like to. It's nearly the same every time.. =X

5. What musical instrument would Bhavani most likely play?

She will play guitar and rocks the stage like nobody's business. Her theme song would be '' Desirable Desire that I d'sire!!''.

6. Hot Likee on Xiying action - Yes/No?

Well. They are the best example of domestic violence abuse to be included in our school system. It's enlightening and will attract a lot of audience.

7. What would you do if you hadn't met Xiying?

Well, I won't die if I hadn't met Xiying. However, meeting her will make you wonder the beauty and diversity that the life can offer to you. IT'S CERTAINLY INTERESTING.. WAHAHA
XD

8. Describe Venesy in five words.

Lovely, cute, exciting, fun-loving, RAR!!!

9. Have you dreamt of Joram before?

Yeah. As the matter of the fact, we were having yum cha session and just chilling
out.

10. Do you miss Anna Grace?

Maybe not now.. But when she leaves for Australia, it will be a different feeling. LOL... Hope she did not read this ahahah..

Shessh... this generator really can create random questions that certainly are related and accurate.. Behold, the random things that can be added to enrich your life!!
It's a random post... Weee~~

2008-04-21T10:59:00.000-07:00

Just you & me

Dedicated to one of my besties...

We are like the sun and moon of the sky

We belong to the high heavens, shining down on the face of the earth

The whole world depends on our lights

Our lights are the reflection of our harmonious relationship

Of all the stars in the heavens, you are the only star that brings light to me

That I may shine your light to others

Without you, I have no light to shine for I just have no light of my own

I’m will be just a rock in space

We dutifully go around the earth

So that all the earth will be covered by our light; no one will be left behind

However, we can’t see and meet each other because earth is our barrier

We are separated by distance, time and space but our bond is still strong

Though our bond is strong, we still have much to keep from each other

We keep ourselves together as much as we keep ourselves locked from each other

I know how strong your light is when it reaches me and you know how reflective I am of your light

You’re a star and I’m just a rock, you are the brighter and I am the duller

Here it goes, you and me have much in common but we let our differences separate us

A burning bright star and a small rocky star

Me and you are the envy of the universe, the essence of life

Just you and me, we hover above the great skies

Just you and me, we orbit around earth

Just you and me, we need each other

You and me just need to be closer

You and me just need to open up

Just you and me….

2008-02-09T07:42:00.000-08:00

Poor Story Tale

It's been a long time... Long, long time....
It's been over two years....
And I seemed to be letting go all of my ''attachment'' towards ''her''...
Attachment can be a dangerous thing that can make your brain fry out while at the same time, indulging yourself in pursuit of happiness.....It can be a senseless euphoria that flowing from your heart connected to her ''heart''....

What happened when suddenly, the attachment line between the two hearts was cut?
The one who has been attached would feel suffocated because there is no oxygen of life flowing ever again. It must have been depressing, devastating and traumatic.

Yes, the line between me and her was cut and disconnected. What was the cause behind this disconnection? Rather coming from one of the hearts, the cause has been diagnosed as more towards ''environmental and natural'' causes. - I would not elaborate on this,bwahahaha

Sadly though, the feeling of suffocation did not really happen in my heart. The loss of her is not even damaging towards me as I understand the cause of the problem. It is of course, a boast and denial to say that I am not sad but I prefer to say that I am passive towards the disconnection.
( I understand that there is no chance for both of us at that time and as of now. The future is uncertain of course but I would let things go naturally, that is enjoy my life-lah.)

Side information= We are still in talking terms and there is no conflict between us. Only certain
barriers that prevent the initiation of our ''potential'' relationship.

That was years ago. Though time to time, I was reminded about her indirectly by certain things that happened in life. While that struck me a bit, it is of no big deal to me as I let go of her.

Recently, I dreamed about a book. It is about a novel and the pages were made of brown papers, almost like fairy tales kind of book for kiddies. Inside the book, the story was about me and her.
Imagine if you are dreaming and you are reading about your story. XD
I must be happy that I am the main character.
On the contrary, I more of surprised that even though I have been letting go of her, the dream came and it's like promotional trailer of a upcoming movie. I prefer to call that as remade movie.

By the way, in case you don't know what the crap I am blabbering about, don't care about it, it is of less entertainment value. XP

2007-12-29T06:09:00.000-08:00

Hello,peeps.... It's been a long time since I have last updated my blog....Yeah right... Before it's get too late and anyone get missed out...

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!!!

-Have your Christmas gift list get fulfilled by your parents, friends or even strangers?

-Have you enjoy yourself fully during Christmas?

-Have you been filling your stomach with lots of foods from Christmas parties?

-Or at least having your mailboxes and eardrums full of '' Merry Christmas!!!! ''?

-Sick or bored of Christmas carols ringing from your CDs, radio or TV?

Regardless of anything that you got during Christmas, everyone celebrates it because it's a holiday and one of the days that working people can finally rest and relax. Not entirely true, Christmas makes those who don't have the time to rest to work more...these are the people working in shopping malls. Kinda sad, they cant have the fun to celebrate, most importantly time to rest. = (

Christmas is usually one of the days that really can moved me to tears of joy even the time when I was not a Christian. That's why it's so amazing and significant for me to love and enjoy Christmas so much. Maybe perhaps too emotional, too sweet for a little boy to know what is Christmas all about... Christmas carols are just lovely and sound joyful, although some can be too repetitive and old,ahahaha... presents and gifts exchanged hands between people...how good to be true that you can actually get them from even strangers...

And I love this song...It's called ''We are the reason''

As little children we would dream of Christmas morn
Of all the gifts and toys we knew we’d find
But we never realized a baby born one blessed night
Gave us the greatest gift of our lives

*We were the reason that He gave His life
We were the reason that He suffered and died
To a world that was lost He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live

As the years went by we learned more about gifts
The giving of ourselves and what that means
On a dark and cloudy day a man hung crying in the rain
All because of love
All because of love

*Chorus

I finally found the reason for living
It’s in giving every part of my heart to Him (every part to Him)
And all that I do every word that I say (you know I’ll be saying)
I’ll be giving my all just for Him, for Him (every thing for Him)

We are the reason that He gave His life
We are the reason that He suffered and died
To a world that was lost He gave all He could give (all that he could give all)
To show us the reason to live

#He is the reason to live
(don’t you know do you know the reason
that he came, oh he came to save us
when he gave his life for us) he suffered and died
To a world that was lost He gave everything (everything that He had He gave)
To show us the reason to live

*chorus + # together
Don’t know how I could thank Jesus all that he had all..
*chorus + # together

He's the reason for the season. Happy New Next Year!!!!
God bless and hugs... Take care... =)

2007-10-17T19:55:00.000-07:00

I'm the dark rising!!

2007-08-16T09:49:00.000-07:00

A Confession of a Broken and Shattered Heart

A love story

One day, a friend asked me...
' Do you want to follow me to a place?'
Having nothing to do, I went with my friend.....
Little did I know, I will found something I've been seeking for....

I found you there....
The first time I saw your beauty..
I had been drawn nearer and nearer to you.....
The one that I will fall in love with......

You're so beautiful.....
In my heart, I thought I had found my way....
Your presence made me felt welcomed...
I felt happy to confess my love to you...

And I did......
Enjoyed doing things together with you...
Having fun and laughter with you...
You made me committed to you.....

However, there were others coming out...
Others that seemed better than you....
The cry from my past....
The pains from my experiences...
Told me to break away from you....
That you no longer satisfy me.....
I want to break up with you.....

I took drugs to satisfy myself......
And I enjoy them very much.......
That soon, I grew addicted to them....
As time passed, the dose went bigger....

Meanwhile, I took pleasure of pursuing other relationships...
Going from one to another.......
All of them do not satisfy fully of my heart....
Nor they too have the thing that I sought.....
I grew disappointed and depressed...
I hate the world and everything in it...
I am tired of looking around and searching...
My mind became more and more chaotic....
My heart became void of emotion and cold....

People looked down on me......
Outwardly, they looked kind...
But, inwardly they are actually cruel and merciless...
There is no justice in this world...No one will give me hope...
People with wealth and power bullied me and chased me away...
Not enough with that, they even cursed me....
I have no one to come to.... I felt alone....

The police arrested me and brought me to a camp....
I suffered more humiliation and my heart raging with heart...
Threatening to seek revenge for those who are responsible....
But I knew it was pointless and I could not do anything....
In my heart I cried for someone to care for me....

But then, you came and visited me in a unexpected way....
Your love moved me to tears and give me a new life...
As if I am born again, I will never be the same again...
Never see the world in the same old perspective.....
I never know....that....you have the thing that I've been seeking...
All those pains and hurts are gone when I looked to you....

I felt guilty and shameful but you said....
'That doesn't matter because I still love you and want you back to my arms....
I broke down, not knowing what to do....
But you assured me and just smiled to me....
Your smile gives me the hope,comfort and love....
All my worries,anxieties and fear are casted away....
My eyes are filled with the hope you give...
My soul is brimming with the life you create in me....

You kiss me on my cheek and hug me....
Giving the warmth that I've always wanted...
I no longer feel shaken by cold....
You gave me acceptance....

My heart shattered when I thought how I treat you last time....
How I abandon your love for another....
And make your love look cheap...
Yet your faith in me still continue....
The price you took for me is too high and unbearable....
But you said that I am worth it...

I feel and taste your sweet love...
I want to kiss you more and will never let you again...
I want to celebrate the freedom I have gain...
I want to share everything I have with you....
I will never forget your love which held my hand...

Though the reality showed that I am infected with a lot of diseases...
Because of what I did in the past and now I carried the burden....
But whenever your love touches my heart, I shall not fear and not give up..
Your love never fades and never fail to cheer me up...
Thank you for undying and unstoppable love,my lover.....
>Jesus....For the joy and blessing you have bring to my life.....<

2007-07-12T19:16:00.000-07:00

It's called RANDOM

It's been a long time since my last post. Yeah...really a long,long time... For most of you guys out there, u guys will be wondering what I am doing. Not surprisingly, I also don't know what I am doing. Hahahaha.... Funny? No..... Lame... Random... That's what my close friends would call me.... wO-ok... now this post is about randomness of my life.....

UPDATES of random things in my life :

1. Officially and legally,I am now 19 years old... Yeah!!! Still young..... Enjoying my youth and treasuring my life. Why? I don't like celebrating my birthday because it's not very fun n uncool to celebrate... Haha, surprised? Oh,well..that's last time... Nowadays, I do enjoy celebrating my birthday. I also want to thank again my friends especially from CF for helping to celebrate my birthday.... Haha... Birthday shows the beginning of a life crawling from outside to embrace the light....

2. For those I think mostly of you guys, I have moved to Petaling Jaya and really,really stayed there for a longer term... Now, I have a house there both in west and east, these safehouses will always be part of my erm...habitation...settlement.. hahaha..... Frankly speaking, the idea of moving to PJ by my family's decision also somehow shocked me.. Aiya... Cos i'm surprised mad and i need time to accept and prepare for it... know it,yo? Praise Lord now that I can settle down with my family in my new place..... Halleluyah!!!

3. My hair has grow longer n thicker for the past few months... Hurrah!!! Hehe... sorry lah... Mind you, for someone who went for NS, this is a very BIG-BIG thing... ya know? Furthermore, I came from a school who specialized in creating and training a generation of elite smart cut ship crews ...All of us who came from that school had endured long years of stabilizing our hair growth and had long patience of standardizing and maintaining all similar hair cuts, this was what they called as fraternity of the Brotherhood .... All of this measures are for the preseverance of the humanity .... SRY... Must have been watching too many sci-fi fictions...

4. i HAVE Just ''break dance in ice cream'' ( Warning!!! This is a insider joke and those who laughed because of it,will be persecuted for not respecting ice cream)...U guys know who u r =p

This is the testimony of my randomness and lameness of life.... If u guys are happy with my post, i will come out with the second part of it...hahaha...Want to comment? Bring it on... This is only the beginning....

2007-03-28T10:32:00.001-07:00

DISCLAIMER: BEFORE YOU READ THIS,BE AWARE THAT THIS IS AN OLD POST TAKEN FROM THE AUTHOR'S OLD ARCHIVES
July 19, 2006
Declassified files-Old crushes
Old crushes..silly,stupid....oh..Naivety of mine....
1.Met this girl in school...She's cute for her age and I liked her..She always sweeping the floor in the class...That time...I was very shy so I didn't not get a chance to know her...sO when the fateful day came...she transfered to other school and I never see her again...So my crush dies then...
2.This gal..She's wonderful,caring and bla bla bla...Joined a camp because of her...Thus,I got the oppurtunity to get know her more..She's sweet indeed(from my point of view)..Her smile make me feel confident..Began to get active because of her and began to become talkative because of her(nah..I'm not singing ''keranamu'')..I always get the chance to chat with her and goes to a place where she always at there..This is one of the longest crush I ever had in my life...I was thinking of getting her a nice doll;it's quite cute and portable...So I brought this doll and wanted to give to her as a gift..I like this doll very much and it reminds me of her..In my mind,I thought that if she is happy..so do I..But the doll did not end up at her..Why?She rejected by the time I gathered enough courage to confess to her..Apparently..from my investigations..I found out that she was already attached to someone that she like...So began my moments of despair,cloud of depression gathering in dark,gloomy sky..there is no moon of hope..ops..I'm exaggerating..kekek...but then..I'm really depressed..haha...So ends my crush in her....
3.This gal...She's friend of my friend..And I managed to get to know her by chance...And I was attracted to her...I then trying hard to get her info about her likes or dislikes,her fav,her hobbies,close friends and so on..We also send messages and messages to each other..I enjoyed every message she wrote..I was happy..Finally..all these come to an end when I realised that she had a bf and kept a low profile to it...I felt heartbroken but i still kept contact with her...
Crush is a short-lived and usually an unrequited love or infactuation...So people do have crush in someone that they like..Love is wonderful but chaotic...hahaha...right now..I don't have a crush(nevermind..who cares if I have crush or not,I ain't a special person)...nOw i prefer to keep observing things....Normally people don't write about their crush experiences or do they?I was then a fool to write them down..haha..

2007-03-28T10:29:00.000-07:00

DISCLAIMER: BEFORE YOU READ THIS,BE AWARE THAT THIS IS AN OLD POST TAKEN FROM THE AUTHOR'S OLD ARCHIVES
February 12, 2007
time passes so fast or?
''Time passes so fast''.....we often heard these words spoken whenever we just realise that many things had ended so fast,unaware that we actually ignore the steadiness of time flowing...well...to be honest,the speed of the passing time in our lives actually determined by how we measure and evaluate time...
wELL...wELL...in this post...there won't be any discussion bout time because whatever that we do,time always passes and always ahead of us..particularly...
time is just another dimension...it's how we reacted to it...haha...yea..because you never know how many things can be happen in just short while...such large magnitude in a short time certainly drive a person nuts,even a weirdo/freak like myself...friendship and love grew like never before with good INVESTMENT of money in this case,love is the main currency..lol..dont get me wrong,i'm not teaching you to view friendship as market share investment...you know that i m not money-minded..rite?(dun let me caught you by saying sarcastic things like ''yea,rite'',i know some fools will....nvm la)ok..back to the topic again...such development of friendship and love overtake space,time,distance(no physics,TQ)..such love and friendship become so overwhelming till it actually changes person alot and become very deep deep and close close friends eventhough in a short period..amazing isn't?there are several cases about such recorded magnitude..in this case we wont use ''Ritcher'' scale...Below are the records of such ‘’supernatural’’ friendship:
Case 1- Here we got a really shy guy and a supertalkaltive girl..one never know that such match will become a ''extraordinary'' friendship..given this girl is really sporting,talkaltive,happening and this guy is completely the opposite..what truly link them together as special friends are the openness of the heart,appreciation of others..other people misunderstand their relationship,but actually their relationship is a true and genuine with overdose of love and appreciation till the point of both of them nearly fall in love together..isn't it's good such good and understanding close friends can come together?but both of them do not want that to go far..such deep understanding between the two..this guy until now still misses that girl so much...as a friend...the girl had some serious business so till now..the guy still misses her...hmm...such deep friendship...in few months...intriguing?
Case 2 - There is this guy who meet this girl in an unexpected incident...guess what?they too become good and true friends..just less than few months...see how interesting it can be in just few months..or maybe this girl treats everyone the same with same dose of love and care?the guy and the girl still having a ‘’special’’ kind of relationship..in a sense that so far yet so near..very close not close enough..this is the clear description that the ''measurement'' can give..haha...when the girl leaves for another country,the guy become so distracted,not depressed..because the love and friendship they have together...he just could not believe that he cares a lot for this girl whom he did not meet or know for long time and the girl also has the same opinion….amazing isn’t?
These cases had shown such great friendship can take place between guy and girl…yea…it’s about BGR…but not about ‘’dates’’ and ‘’couples’’..it is more than that…oh yea…there are lot of examples to show such friendship but it is us who confine our thoughts and assume this thing will never take place..well..the thing is love and friendship are grown with sincere heart of appreciation and the willingness to give and take…Seems to be a perfect friendship envisioned by some but we must know that there are lot of things that need to be overcome in building the strong bridge of friendship…’’to love is to expose’’…a great challenge and are we going to take that challenge?

2007-01-02T23:51:00.000-08:00

More than a book,more than a movie,it's all about my life...

5....4....3....2....1....The screen then flashed into the year of 2006 which there are lots of events that happened in our life...The narrator then begin his story....
''2006 gonna over soon...at least in this few hours....2006,six,to some of you guys....might be a sICK experience not only just the word six...six=sick...2006 is the year of transistion for me and some of the people out there...there had been a lot of things happening;both expected or unexpected....normal or abnormal things...rewards or punishment...well..well..for a young man like me...it had been a mixed blessing....
(Recalling the moments I have this year)yeah..i just knew that i am quite a nostalgic kind of person....hehe

National Service

To others,National Service seems not a good thing..at least that's not what I think at the same time...Going there,mixing with different people,having fun together...Is a good thing...well...i guess...it's a matter whether a person decide that he or she want to grow up...But of cos....not everything is totally good or bad..lah..there are good and bad things...rite...
While I am a person who had a low self-esteem...I do have a cold,merciless,vengeful heart...I'm the one who will not forget old grudges,the spirit of revenge lives within me..I am the kind of the person that love to pretend/act and I'm very sarcastic kind of person..This image might have been overportrayed..that's the truth about me back then..yes...I know some of you will not believe this..but this is the truth..
Something changed me...Throughout the National Service camp...when I was in a church service..I felt that God still loves me eventhough I always challenged Him in many ways...4 or 5 years ago..while I accepted Christ..but I was not a pretty ''true'' and ''serious'' Christian back then...I do not viewed Him as important or a God..For me..it's just a religion to be filled in my IC...I always challenge Him and thought that I am more important than Him..I always think that the world revolves around me..
haha...Then in the camp,He ''fried'' me up with troubles,''boiled'' me up to the max and told me that everything is possible if I still believed in Him...since then..my faith is Renewed..no longer a person who is a mixed Christian-Buddhist..but a true person who is a Christian...Through the camp..I actually learnt a lot of things and He made me grow stronger and freed me from a lot of things...at least I beginning to feel His undying love..and even though I disconnected from Him..He still wants me back..I rejected and disregarded Him but He still loves me..
Therefore in this camp..I renewed my relationship with Him...
Different people got their own different expectations in NS camp...Welcome to the real,innocent,cute,funny world...
In NS camp..you have many kinds of people..believe it or not..some are weird,some are like/macam(I have no comment)...but despite this..we all can get together and enjoy...For me then...I never know I will become a re-born Christian in the camp..I never expected it to be happen....I am in awe of Him..I do not expect my self to get re-born or revived for Him..I simply do not desire Him back then...I thanked Him for being with me throughout the camp and helping me to know the people in the camp...

Back from NS

After a few months...I had left the NS camp which holds good and bad experience that I have in my life..well...that's called growing process ;)
Got my SPM result..I am not really disappointed just felt O.K. with it since I know that my ability,I cannot hope for higher achievements...In my hometown..I have been called as ''lazy'' because I haven't get into college or form 6...Actually I am in the process of determining my interest and career path in my life..I got a lot of criticisms simply I was the ''late'' person to go to another stage of education...lol...nvm...hehe..There were few brothers and sisters that supported and encouraged me along the way..Thanks..guys....also to you..My Lord.. ;)
My fire as a Christian seems to have die or extinguish because I do not always seek Him and am spiritually dry...Because I don't have transport to go to church and no one to follow me up..I'm lost and depressed...failed to adjust with the realities of my life...Until a nice brother came and invited me to a Youth Camp which fills me again with passion for Him and I had a greater understanding in Him..there's more than just to going to church and study His Word..It was so spiritually alive that I had been filled with His love,passion,patience,joy,hope and strength once more...I always prayed to Him that I can go to church every week when I am in the college..hehe..I always pray to Him daily since I was in NS...I love to talk to Him and He is my source of comfort...and relief too...

College?

Which college am I going?Haha...This is one of the most fascinating things in my life...Initially...i should be going to Taylors geh...but...but...I THOUGHT the dateline is over...which leaves the choice between KDU or HELP...As the course that I wanted to study is law..(I dunno why i had a interest in this course though)..HELP seems less attractive to me so I chose KDU which was smaller and looks more humble which does not appeal me in any way...sounds contradicitng eh?hehe..Nevertheless...I still choose KDU...(dONT ASK me why...)
The few weeks before going to KDU...i FOUND OUT THat the Taylors' dateline is not over YET...ah..oh..well..nevermind....;)

College days,months but less than a year?

Ops..sry the title above looks funny..hehe...nvm..KDU is a interesting place...The time when I was a outstation student..I prayed that I will found a new life,happiness,love,joy...and of cos..going to church...yeh..hurray..sorry-Lah..i might be stupid or kampung like I haven't been to a church..i GOT my own reason..hehe...FUN and HAPPENING might be as I found in my college...I felt there are something bad behind all these funs...I might have blinded by all those HAPPENING things..but I have learnt to accept things...While my struggles have been stronger..My faith in Him too became stronger to the point of overcoming my own weaknesses... ;)
I was taking a pre-Law A level course which is less than a year..that should clear your doubts about my sub title above...hehe

CF

Before arriving here..I do not plan to go to join CF because I want to join student council..lol..to (buang masa)..Something happen in the second week..a sister asked me whether to join CF..so i accept only see what's so special about CF... ;)
About CF again..I thought it will be boring and wasting time but once I joined in,I became a regular(dunno why...haha...maybe i really have nothing better to do)In this CF I really learnt a lot of things that changed me and drawn me closer to Him...
In CF..I just found out that it is more than just a fellowship..more than that...Here..I met a lot of people...All with different personalities(diverse) but all shared the Same(common) love,respect for others...From them..I certainly had learnt a lot of things in many areas...I meant..ermm...really a lot..uncountable..unmeasurable..
So in college..because of my ''active'' involvement in the CF,I undoubtedly had been associated with CF in my college and termed as ''religious'' kind of person..hehe..to all of my college friends and new friends..but..hey..before that..I wasn't like that..I just dunno why I like CF...well...I am just a person who loves God dearly..because His Amazing Grace and Love had touched and melted my heart..oh..I don't know how..I am no longer the ''dark'' kind of person...hmmm....=>
Through my CF also...I finally had settled down in a church(Yea..hurray)..hehe...;)

Cell Group

Haha..cell groups...since I did not always go to church..I don't know there is such thing as cells in church..In biology..I learnt about body cells..,physics...battery cells...lol... cells in jail...how about the church's cell? No one know but He knows that.....................
In my visit to other church,I had been approached by a guy(looked like a salesman)..a fellow brother whom I don't know and invited me to the cell...i asked for his number and i will contact him if i interested in joining...hehe...And but then,due to something like ''boring'' reason..I ended up joining the cell..In my cell..I also met a lot of people...learnt a lot of things and enjoy my time there with my ''cellmates''..lol...gee...nice to know u guys...U guys SURE teach me a lot of things..;)

YQ

Although I had been to a lot of church camps before...(at least this year where I had the first experience of going to church camps)..and all of them had enabled me to grow,learning new things,discovering new possibililities..and also..there was this camp,the last of all camps that I joined in this year,the YQ camp..It was in this camp..I really learnt a lot of things...Through this camp..I began to have a greater feeling of mercy and compassion..not just any feeling..but it is natural ... because it comes and flows naturally...I felt no burden in it...D YQ camp certainly had shaken my heart to its foundation/core and showed to me that there is more than just that...and life is not really just very complicated....it is in its simplicity that we taken lightly..lol...in other words..we take things for granted-Lah... ;)Again...nice to know other people in the camp and my tribe too..

31st Dec 2006

It was in this morning of the last day of the year,when I woke and saw an SMS that Aunt Luan had passed away(she's a member of my church)...I was shocked and stunned at the same time..We always been praying for her and there have been miracles but this time (literally) there is none..While I always been encouraging others to accept death(in my belief,physical death)...That was before..Now..I also find it hard to accept this myself..But the Lord told and assured me that ''All is well'' and I believed in His perfect timing...For everthing that happens,there must be a reason in it..We might not know the reason itself..But we see His wisdom around the things that happen...Greater things come to those who wait with patience...Out of sudden,I felt called to reply the sms and to encourage and give His assurance that everything in His Hands and He has the final say in His decision...There is nothing to be worried about...To all of us humans...truth itself is hard and we find it difficult to believe and accept it...Truth or tragedy...The thing is the truth is the tragedy itself..I found myself hard to accept the truth that He still wants me despite I shut Him off in whole my life..tragedy is that the truth sometimes haunt or discourage me..But then..without discouragement,there is no encouragement..it's all in a cycle...;)
In the last 30 minutes in the last day of the year 2006,I walked outside to see fireworks but I heard a farewell song which was Auld something sumthing...as the tune mixed with the lyrics went inside my ears..I felt touched as I am bidding farewell to all my past experiences that I have this year...2006 had passed...I watched as the sky was lit with the dazzling displays of fireworks which looked like ''Perancah Maggie,tomato and chilli sauce being mixed and fried together''...lol...sry..I know i am lame...
Oh..2007 had arrived...For all of us out there..we began to imagine new things,new experiences and of course new life..For me...2007 is not just 7-11 where you can get everything instantly..it will be more than that..more than all your dreams,hopes,goals,resolutions,aspirations or tests,exams,challenges,struggles,difficulties..or more than anything that one only could imagine of......From 2006 itself..I saw myself learnt a lot of things and being well nurtured by Him,I had been freed from my depression,my loneliness,rejection and being drawn towards Him..In my journey to get things right before Him..I faced tough challenges and struggles against myself,my friends,my family and yet I prevailed with His help and aid..Welcome to 2007...I believed there will be a lot of challenges and struggles...as I had been elevated to high position in this world..and I need His help to make things right..I felt the calling.. ''
(THis documentary Had over...The narrator thanked all of the people who are patient enough and willing to bear with this long movie or documentary...to listen his stories of his experiences...All of this stories are real and I,the narrator bore witness to all these events in my life...My beliefs and my point of view in the stories are different than other people and while the stories can be summarized as ''how a young man find his new life in this world'',these stories themselves are very meaningful to the narrator himself..and everyone is entitled to his or her opionions..)
As the credits rolling...the narrator give thanks to Him who had been leading him...faithful brothers and sister who encouraged him,caring family members and relatives...cute,funny and good friends who enjoyed the friendship with him.....
------------------------------------THE END------------------------------------
bUT..hey....heee...waittt....
Happy New Year 2007 to all of the people out there!!!

2006-11-18T22:53:00.000-08:00

What's my major?

You scored as History/Anthropology/LiberalArts. You should strongly consider majoring (or minoring) in History, Anthropology, or related majors (e.g. African and African-American Studies, Chinese, Classics, Cultural Studies, Economics, English, French, Geography, German, Greek, Hebrew, International Studies, Philosophy, Women's Studies, or other Liberal Arts majors).

It is possible that the best major for you is your 2nd, 3rd, or even 5th listed category, so be sure to consider ALL majors in your OTHER high scoring categories (below). You may score high in a category you didnt think you would--it is possible that a great major for you is something you once dismissed as not for you. The right major for you will be something 1) you love and enjoy and 2) are really great at it.

Consider adding a minor or double majoring to make yourself standout and to combine your interests. Please post your results in your myspace/blog/journal.

Religion/Theology

100%

Psychology/Sociology

100%

English/Journalism/Comm

100%

History/Anthropology/LiberalArts

100%

PoliticalScience/Philosophy

94%

French/German/Spanish

94%

Education/Counseling

88%

HR/BusinessManagement

75%

Physics/Engineering

63%

Visual&PerformingArts

63%

Biology/Chemistry/Geology

56%

Nursing/AthleticTraining

50%

Accounting/Finance/Marketing

25%

Mathematics/Statistics

13%

WHAT MAJOR IS RIGHT FOR YOU?
created with QuizFarm.com

Well...well..well....my major....or should I say..majors...are history/anthropology/liberal arts,psychology/sociology,english/journalism/comm and religion/theology...Lol...the thing is that I don't know there are a lot of things I love to know and I quite hunger for any knowledge....I don't know whether this is a good thing...simply because I have too many things to consider...while I love and enjoy knowing new things...however I still have ''inadequate'' knowledge about my surroundings,the items that I have been interacting/using and others..

Picture yourself in this scenario,you are on a island and know many,many things from the mainland but yet you do not know much about your surrounding and others...well...that's me..lol.....

But hey,looking at my majors,some might say it's very boring esp. history,religion...but it seems that my brain cells had been emitting waves to me to learn more about these things..lol...funny rite....There are risks in knowing too much,haha...be it true or not,because you know a lot of things,you will view a thing in many point of views,making the conclusion quite hard to draw...and in your mind,there will be countless argument,debates among your brain cells,arguing the suitable approach to be applied in achieving the true objective that one wish to achieve...ops...in other words...it's too complicated..hehe

In this world,there are much to learn indeed and there are many things that needed to keep up with,one cannot hope to absorb all of these knowledge into a brain just easily as a sponge does...

Different people might have differing opinion about the differences between knowing things and not knowing ....................

2006-10-17T20:30:00.000-07:00

Hey...this my ''official blog''...I am just testing it...;p
HaSies CrimaXious's bloOog will be open soon...